12 thoughts on “You're Not Cool

  1. ….

    As a person of the pale persuasion, I must say this:

    Dear White People:

    You can’t get away with saying things like “of shizle”, much less putting it on your car. It makes you, and by proxy, the rest of us look like a douche.

    It’s not cute. Especially on a tiny little convertible.

    Matter of fact, it’s so gay, it makes ME temporarily straight. I don’t like that sensation at ALL.

    So in conclusion, don’t be a douche. You’re never going to have an “ethnic edge”.

    Sincerely,

    A Super Pale Lesbian

    • My first serious girlfriend was so super pale I could see when she had to poop. She made Elvira look like George Peppard. She’d get sunburned during full moons. Goths pointed at her.

      She was pale.

      I dug it.

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