The answer to her dilemma is found in the song lyrics for “How To Skin A Cat” by the seminal punk rock band Hüsker Dü:
We are starting a cat ranch and taking one hundred thousand cats
Each cat will have twelve kittens a year
The catskins will sell for thirty cents each
One hundred men could skin five thousand cats a day
We could be dealing a profit of over ten thousand dollars
But what should we feed the cats?
We will start a rat ranch next door with a million rats
The rats will breed twelve times faster than the cats
So we can have more rats to feed each day for each cat
But what should we feed the rats?
We will feed the rats
The carcases of the cats
After they have been skinned
Now get this!
We feed the rats to the cats and the cats to the rats
And get the catskins for nothing
Why do they call it “The Learning Channel” when watching it makes one dumber?
If only one of them would just frown perpetually, she could retire.
I can remember when the big dumb animals on TLC were in nature programs.
I can haz feud stamps?
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